From Here to Horse by Emily Adamek

From Here to Horse

1.
In the days of wanting, I wanted
a horse. Long of lash and face,
a swan-like neck for me to lean.
Knowing eyes and mighty hooves,
racing for the sake of running.

At night, I prayed for Palominos.
Studied horse breed bibles, asking God
for American Paints.

In daylight hours, I did the math,
drew crayon-colored maps
knowing horses don’t come cheap.
Quarters earned marks along the switchback path,
a happy road from Here to Horse.

I’m grown now, and I have quite a lot—
A house and husband, fear, hope, fear. No horse; a fact that is fine
or ruinous, depending on the light. Worse, I haven’t wanted much
since I was thirteen.

2.
In the days of not wanting, I wanted
to want a horse. Or be one, maybe.
Christ, make me Steady Clydesdale,
much to carry. Wild-eyed and insolent,
Appaloosa Queen. Mighty hooves
to race the cosmic revolutions
where wanting is a tidal wonder
moved by things unseen.

3.
In the days of racing, I would want
nothing as much as the wind.
I would want,
. . . . . . . . . . . . want,
. . . . . . . want
with my entire ten-pound heart.

by Emily Adamek

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Emily.Hope.Adamek
Instagram: @emi_lemonnn

Editor’s Note: This poem speaks of how we move through life from childhood to adulthood, and in the end, nothing much changes even as everything does.